Setting Boundaries for His Bachelor Party

By: Alexine

The bachelor party is one of the most difficult obstacles for a wife-to-be and there is good reason for this. Between the rowdy single men and alcoholic beverages there is way too much room for disaster. Let’s face it ladies, there are way too many horror stories from bachelor parties that have gotten out of hand. To avoid the possibility of experiencing the horrors yourself it is important that you set boundaries and communicate with him about your feelings. Here are some ideas to make this discussion a bit easier.

Well you hope by now that you have a pretty good idea about the man your about to marry. You’ve seen him on his best days and been there for him on the worst. Through all the ups and downs the two of you have been able to bond and developed a close relationship based on trust. While there are still minor insecurities, for the most part things are in good shape and you completely trust each other.

With a foundation of trust still come questions of boundaries and influences. In is not so bad if your fiancé is the last of his friends to get married. However, if he is the first there are way too many possible scenarios for the bachelor party. This is where setting boundaries is extremely important so that you do not feel bad about the situation.

The most important thing to talk about is what you are comfortable with as far as the more erotic bachelor party activities. Strip clubs and rented strippers at house parties are two popular things the guys planning the party incorporate into the night. While some women have no problem with this, there are a lot of women who do not feel comfortable about the activities involved with either of those things.

Even though some women don’t have a problem with strip clubs and strippers in general, they still have a line that can be crossed. This is where setting boundaries is extremely important. If you don’t mind using eyes but do mind touch, make sure you specify this to him.

However, if you can not stand the idea of any erotic activity and it goes against your morals make sure and talk seriously about it with your fiancé. Don’t make it sound like your trying to be controlling or don’t trust him. Approach the topic in a “from the bottom of my heart” and sincere way. By this point in the relationship there is usually a common ground and he will respect your feelings.

An important factor to remember is that men and women have different ideas of what is ok and what is not. Then when you add alcohol into the equation there is was too much room for disaster. To avoid a bad situation where the guys loose their discretion, discuss alcohol consumption. For those who drink often a few drinks will be just fine, but if they have not had a drink in a while then only about one or two is way more than enough.

Although this may be a tough night to figure out and discuss with your fiancé, make sure you do talk about it. Communication is very important and I can not stress it enough. Remember the golden rule of “treating other as you would like to be treated” and in this case ask him “how would you feel if I did that.” This keeps the two of you thinking about each other instead of yourselves.

Good luck with the topic and remember that he will probably want to give input about the bachelorette party as well.