After your wedding and honeymoon are over the reality of a huge life change sets in. As a result many decisions have to be made. Both you and your spouse will have to discuss your feelings on important matters to help the transition go smoothly. In order to help prepare for these discussions I have come up with ten very important topics you will want to cover after the wedding.
Moving In
While this is not the case for some couples who moved in together while they were dating, there are still many couples that choose to wait until after the wedding. Overall moving in together can be a very exciting thing to think about and prepare for but it can be a very stressful transition. Every person has their particulars when it comes to their daily schedules and how they live on their own. Be patient with each other in the beginning as it takes time to adjust to the other person’s ways.
House
Sometimes couples have the financial means to afford a house and use their first year of marriage to find a house together or move into one of the houses if each person owns one. The decision of which house to keep and sell may be a sticky situation but making the decision based on accommodations and location is the safest. Make sure the home you purchase or choose to keep is the best fit for your new life together.
Schedules
After marriage there can be issues with the careers you have and the amount of time you have for each other. Sometimes you may work shifts that keep the time together in your home limited. This can be very hard on any relationship and result in lots of stress. To avoid this issue make sure your schedules complement each other and you have the needed time to be a couple. This might mean change.
Relocating
The decision to relocate after marriage may have to do with where you can afford to purchase a house or where your family lives. Sometimes couples meet at college and work there so they don’t live near their families and then when they settle down the need to live near family sets in. On the other hand you may want to afford to buy a house in which relocating is the only way to make this happen. The most important aspects of this decision are that you focus on being with each other and work together.
Children
Some couples already have children before the wedding but for most of you that is a plan for your future together. Hopefully you discussed that you both want children before marriage so after getting married you will decide when to start. Some couples start right away and end up with a baby nine months past their honeymoon and others wait a few years. Just make sure you are on the same page.
Animals
The decision to get an animal that requires a lot of attention like a dog is quite a large one. There is a lot of responsibility and time involved in caring for the animal. However, if you already have animals then the transition can also be hard. Some animals will only listen to their primary owner or favor that person which can be quite frustrating. Try and be understanding towards the other person if you notice this behavior and encourage their relationship with the animal.
Finances
The finances are one of the more difficult things to figure out in some relationships. Some people choose to put all of their money into one bank account and others choose to have their own. If you have one bank account then you can create a budget that determines all your necessary expenses and then gives each of you spending money. However, if you both have your own accounts then dividing the bills depending on how much you make is fair so you both still have money for yourselves.
Friends
After getting married the single friends that have a bad relationship a month may get a little old. Do not be worried if you find yourself drifting towards people that are also in stable relationships and acting a little more grown up. This is very common and while your spouse may make new friends there may not be a connection between you and their friend’s spouse. Sometimes that happens and other times you will meet couples you both get along with great.
Retirement
While retirement is normally a long ways away when you get married it is an important topic to think about. Starting some sort of retirement savings plan early in life will ensure that you have money to live off of when you get old. While some jobs have plans included with working for a given amount of years, other jobs do not offer any retirement. If you have that type of job make sure you take your own percentage out each month and put it into a plan at your bank.
Life Insurance
Another important financial decision you will want to make after your wedding is whether or not you want life insurance. This is something that would protect your spouse from having to sell the house and cars if you died and are the main source of income. If you are going to hold off on getting life insurance then you may want to rethink the decision once you have children and one of you stays home.
Communicate
The most important part about adjusting to married life is communication. If you do not share your feelings or thoughts about the decisions in your life then your spouse will not know what makes you happy. Talking about each important decision you make will ensure that you come to an understanding about most aspects of life. This is an important habit to form so you do not hurt your spouse.
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